Maturing
I've said before that spiritual growth is all about love and relationships. The more we love, the more we're like Jesus. In good measure, that growth happens when we become more aware--specifically self-aware. In fact, that's what any kind of maturity is.
Mature adults (I'm sure you've noticed that not every adult is mature) can step back and evaluate how they're feeling. Children rarely have that ability. Immature people are driven by feelings and we know that feelings can be very deceptive. Feelings follow our wants. Wants are generally selfish. I want something and I don't get it, so I get mad and fight with my wife. James 4:1 says as much.
But mature people ask the question, "Why do I feel this way?" "Why am I so irritable today?" "Is it appropriate for me to feel this way?" When we can ask these questions and answer them honestly, we can love better.
The reason I'm thinking about this is because I've been reading about the discipline of solitude. As I think about it, I think this may be one of the most important disciplines for people in our society.
Our society is busy. In fact, the most common response when you as someone how they're doing use to be "fine" but now it's "busy." And people wear it like a badge of honor--if they're busy, they're valuable, because if they're busy they must be doing something important.
Busyness only compounds the lack of self-awareness. When we don't have the time to evaluate our feelings, we can't ask the question if they're appropriate. We just go with whatever we're feeling. Not only this, but busyness tends to get us agitated anyway. When we're in a hurry, we'll tend to think the guy driving in front of us is an idiot. Rather than seeing him as a valuable human, we see him as an obstacle to be overcome.
Lately I've been thinking that I need to carve our more time for quiet and solitude-I dont' get enough of it and I'm not very good at it when I do have the time. I have a feeling that as I do, I'll become a more loving (mature?) person. I'll let you know.
Mature adults (I'm sure you've noticed that not every adult is mature) can step back and evaluate how they're feeling. Children rarely have that ability. Immature people are driven by feelings and we know that feelings can be very deceptive. Feelings follow our wants. Wants are generally selfish. I want something and I don't get it, so I get mad and fight with my wife. James 4:1 says as much.
But mature people ask the question, "Why do I feel this way?" "Why am I so irritable today?" "Is it appropriate for me to feel this way?" When we can ask these questions and answer them honestly, we can love better.
The reason I'm thinking about this is because I've been reading about the discipline of solitude. As I think about it, I think this may be one of the most important disciplines for people in our society.
Our society is busy. In fact, the most common response when you as someone how they're doing use to be "fine" but now it's "busy." And people wear it like a badge of honor--if they're busy, they're valuable, because if they're busy they must be doing something important.
Busyness only compounds the lack of self-awareness. When we don't have the time to evaluate our feelings, we can't ask the question if they're appropriate. We just go with whatever we're feeling. Not only this, but busyness tends to get us agitated anyway. When we're in a hurry, we'll tend to think the guy driving in front of us is an idiot. Rather than seeing him as a valuable human, we see him as an obstacle to be overcome.
Lately I've been thinking that I need to carve our more time for quiet and solitude-I dont' get enough of it and I'm not very good at it when I do have the time. I have a feeling that as I do, I'll become a more loving (mature?) person. I'll let you know.
Labels: busyness, James 4:1, maturity, self-aware, self-awareness, spiritual growth
posted by Kory at
1:53 PM
1 Comments:
Wow... I just read this post now. A few minutes ago I wrote my own thoughts down about "conspiracy of activity" that very much mirrors your thoughts. I focused on the "I'm not very good at it when I do have the time." Isn't that crazy? Even if I'm not busy, sometimes I do busywork to avoid what my spiritual life perhaps most needs. Humans are weird. :-)
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